Wednesday, December 05, 2007

10 Ways on how to make loads of money

Hi everyone, I know I have a few dedicated fans, so here are a few more thoughts, especially to DublinMan whom I admire immensely and not forgetting HeavensAbove whose feminine intuituion never ceases to amaze me.

10 Ways on how to make loads of money and be a moral failure.

  1. Respond to a phone call after putting an advert in Yellow Pages or local rag.
  2. Appear very willing and eager. Credibility and plausibility are key. A suit goes a long way. Apparently people believe in suit wearers more than anyone else.
  3. If the person you are dealing with is extremely naive and gullible, take full advantage.
  4. Offer a price for the job, try any Mickey Mouse price to see how much one can get away with.
  5. Condemn the last guy who did an awful job.
  6. Turn up for the first jobs bright and smiling working at full efficiency and as promised.
  7. Then over time become less and less efficient and spend even shorter times doing the jobs promised to the point when one is virtually doing nothing.
  8. If one is really cheeky one can ask for even more money for doing less.
  9. If someone finds out about this apparently full-proof system, condemn them to purgatory, be shocked, offended and if pushed to the very limit become very hostile.
  10. You then have an excuse to take the money and run.

This might seem to be an open invitation to encourage such behaviour but I can assure you it is no such thing. This goes on all the time without any encouragement.

10 Ways on how to make loads of money and be a moral success.
  1. Respond to a phone call after putting an advert in Yellow Pages or local rag.
  2. Define a price for the job that is fair and reasonable.
  3. Do the work as promised.
  4. Turn up every time bright and smiling or grumpy even, it don't really matter as long as you do the job as promised.
  5. Do the work as promised.
  6. Ask for more money only if there is extra work or there are rising costs.
  7. Do the work as promised.
  8. Offer feedback and criticism of any work done and build on it.
  9. Do the work as promised.
  10. Make loads of money based on the idea that one does a good job and can be trusted, with loads of integrity thrown in.

See that's not hard is it ? or is it ?